Derek's 8th Birthday

When it is your child's birthday, there are three things you must do here in Holland.

1. Make a snack and/or small gift for everyone in the class and something nice for the teacher. This is called a 'tractatie'.
2. Arrange a birthday party for your child and several of his friends.
3. Arrange a birthday party for your child where adults can come and congratulate the family.

We didn't actually make it to step 3 this year, because step 2 just about killed us. My son, who is a sweet and friendly boy, invited fifteen (15) FIFTEEN boys ranging from 7 to 9 years old to his birthday. So, from 12:00 until 17:30 on Saturday August the 30th of this year, I really really wanted to have some earplugs.

Putting the cake on the table was easy enough. Keeping the boys from daring each other to jump out of our 7th story window was a bit more complex. And walking the kids to a bowling alley that is only a few blocks away was harrowing and nightmarish. We had arranged to have two other parents come to help us with herding duties, but one begged off because a problem at work.

15 boys, against 3 adults.

I say that as if you might know what the hell that MEANS. And if you do know, then you have my sympathy.

After the bowling alley, we walked them back to the house and watched them play soccer in a field until it was time for their parents to pick them up. It ended up okay. No one was hurt, all the kids seemed to have a good time. I have to count it as a success, but next year, "No more than 7 kids, Derek. No more than 7."